Tag Archives: Celebrities Pounding It

Check out all the Hollywood Blondes! They are POUNDING IT!

Like any other media outlet, Celebrities Pounding It has to constantly take the temperature of the Global Media Consumer.  When we asked you, the people, whom you wanted to see Pounding It more than any other, the answer came back loud and clear.  Blondes Pounding It.  Especially blonde women, Pounding It especially hard.  And so, since we are a compliant media who always give the people whatever they want, no matter how vapid or puerile the peoples’ desires may be, here comes a huge stack of Blondes Pounding It!  Let’s start off with refreshments…

You better believe blondes have more fun, especially when they’re Pounding It! Check out Perez Hilton, Pounding the Sweet Tea!

It looks like a Share Pound to us – if only we could know the lucky sharer!

It looks like a Share Pound to us – if only we could know the lucky sharer!

Gwyneth Paltrow is giving these tasty raviolis the Pounding that they have always desired. Nice one, Gwyneth!

Could use a little Cholula, but whatevs.

Could use a little Cholula, but whatevs.

Check out Nicole Kidman, sticking it in there like she doesn’t give a shit.  Beautifully Pounded, M’lady!

A truly gorge-ous Celebrity Pounder!

A truly gorgeous Celebrity Pounder!

Here’s Heidi Montag, giving a Sweet Pounding to a single raspberry!  WOW!

Not really Pounding It, but she’s blonde, so we’re going with it.

Not really Pounding It, but she’s blonde, so we’re going with it.

Lady Gaga is Pounding It in a very stagy and precocious way.  Pretty amazed with the speed at which this chick fell off the national Give-A-Fuck registry.

NEXT!

NEXT!

Kirsten Dunst is awesome.  We have no idea what she’s Pounding, and we don’t really care.  And now, out of respect for her privacy, we’re gonna back off.

What a doll.

What a doll.

Okay, that’s enough for a while – we’re going to take some time off and  let the batteries recharge for a bit, maybe recapture some of the love of this business that has slipped away recently.  But if any of you PoundWatchers have a great snapshot of a celebrity really giving the business to a plate of spaghetti, or a giant platter of BBQ, or a mile-high mud pie, feel free to send it our way.  We might add it to the pantheon of Celebrities Pounding It!

Former US Secretary of State Hillary Rodham Clinton is Cramming It with Walnuts!

Hillary Clinton dominates.  She knows what she’s talking about and she takes action where others cower.  And here she is, Pounding a chocolate-coated ice-cream bar rolled in delicious walnuts.  Down the Yummy Tunnel with you, frozen treat!

She’s gonna be a kick-ass president starting in 2016.  We all know it.

She’s gonna be a kick-ass president starting in 2016. We all know it.

UPDATED – Mrs. Clinton is in fact Cramming It with Crushed Almonds.  We apologize for the error.  #CPI

Check out Simon Pegg – Wearin’ his Otchkies and Poundie-Wounding a Bit of the Old Cotton Candy!

Mr. Pegg is putting a touch of the sladky stuff straight into his gutti-wuts.  Nicely Pounded, Sir!

Be sure to brush, Simon – that stuff is bad for your zoobies!

Be sure to brush, Simon – that stuff is bad for your zoobies!  Tip of the hat to Simon’s droogie, Nathan Fillion!

Hell YEAH! Here are two of our Favorite Pounders, Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson – and they are POUNDING IT!

Are these two a fuckin’ DELIGHT or WHAT?  They have chemistry on and off the screen, they leave it all on the field, and whenever they get the chance, they Pound It like a pair of wild malamutes.  Ladies and gents, Vince Vaughn (upper left) and Owen Wilson (lower right).  Cheers, gentlemen!

Awesome Sauce!

Awesome Sauce!

Hey Fatties! How would you like to Pound one of THESE?

McGurgles

McGurgles

Morgan Spurlock, always the provocateur and “terrible infant” of the modern documentary cycle, is shoving into your face the exact burger that made him feel like this.

Looks like he’s about to hurk.  Because he IS about to hurk.

Looks like he’s about to yak. Because he IS about to yak.

There he goes…

YAK!

YAK!

It also made him feel like this…

Beep…  beep…  beep…

Beep… beep… beep…

And this…

Actually, he was just taking a call in this one.

Actually, he was just taking a call in this one.

What is it about this barely-digestable little greasebag (the Big Mac, not Mr. Spurlock) that is so impossible for so many people worldwide to resist?

In France, they call it Le Big Mac.

In France, they call it Le Big Mac.

They may love it all over the world, but that disgusting little burger is 100% American thru and thru!

Yow!  How about a side of cheddar cheese stuffed cornbread lard balls with kickin’ jalapeno honey jam to go along with that?

Yow! How about a side of cheddar cheese stuffed cornbread lard balls with kickin’ jalapeno honey jam to go along with that?

What can you do?  But as long as Mr. Spurlock learned his lesson about proper diet, then everything is gonna be…

Come ON!

Come ON!

Nothing more to add. Stay healthy, Pounders!  #CPI

HOO-BOY! Jason Biggs is Pounding the World’s Spiciest Bagel!

Check him out!  The star of Grassroots, the new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (Leonardo), and Saving Silverman is Pounding a bagel stuffed deep with Scotch Bonnet Peppers, which are eighty times hotter than the most fiery Poblano.

You better get yourself a smoothie PRONTO, homes!

You better get yourself a smoothie PRONTO, homes!

Here is a picture of the super-hot Scotch Bonnet. Handle it with care, Pounders!

Spicy!

Spicy!

The only thing hotter than this bagel is Jason’s special lady – check out his wife Jenny Mollen – actress, screenwriter, essayist and artist. She rules.  Check her out on Twitter at @jennyandteets.

Clearly, Mr. Biggs is used to dealing with Hot and Spicy!

Clearly, Mr. Biggs is used to dealing with the Hot and the Spicy!

They are a Hollywood Romance, burning hotter than the Scoville Scale can measure.

These two are cute as fuck. There's no denying it.

These two are cute as fuck. There’s no denying it.

Keep on Pounding It, y’all!  #CPI

Amanda Seyfried is Destroying a Giant Raw Peeled Russet Potato! Now THAT’S Pounding It!

Frying? Baking? Roasting? Those are all potato-cooking processes that suck up valuable Pounding Time.  Just peel the damn thing!

It gets no fresher than this! Nice Pound, Amanda!

It gets no fresher than this! Nice Pound, Amanda!

We found a Girl with Far Away Eyes – it’s Sarah Jessica Parker, and she’s Sarah Jessica Pounding It!

She’s a SuperBabe and Megastar Supreme – and she is Pounding It like there’s no tomorrow!

SJP knows what Celebrity Pound Appeal is all about! Thanks to Greg Allen / Rex USA!

SJP knows what Celebrity Pound Appeal is all about! Thanks to Greg Allen / Rex USA!

Gaze upon these beautiful cupcakes while you can – Lance Bass is about to Pound every one of ‘em!

Lance Bass is a quadruple threat – he sings, he dances, he acts, and he Pounds It.  These frosty little treats are about to get DESTROYED.

Hat tip to HSPARIARY

Hat tip to HSPARIARY

Whitney Port is Pounding an Artichoke Dip Sandwich! With Cheddar!

Not a sandwich with some Artichoke Dip on it… a Sandwich Entirely Filled With Dip!  Because if she’s going to be serious about pursuing a Mixed Martial Arts title, she’s going to need to pack on a few more Pounds.

You can really taste the Artichoke!

You can really taste the Artichoke!